I don't know how to stop loving you
by sekangel88
Summary: sequel to even after death. Ed can't stop thinking about Roy even after he died. When he learns about children being murdered, it takes a turn for the worse. How could he stop the killer when the intended target all along has been Haydyn?
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal alchemist.

Warning: Past MPREG.

* * *

><p>ONE<p>

_He opened his eyes wondering what was going on until he saw the one he was hoping would come back was there. He was soundly sleeping beside him and a smile tugged at Ed's lips. It had to be a dream. Of course it had to have been he thought. Roy wouldn't die and leave him all alone. Roy would die before he did that to him. Smiling he leaned over and gave him a big kiss on the cheek enjoying the feel of raking his hands through the raven dark hair. He loved that hair. He loved his lovers eyes. Hell he loved him. He frowned wondering why he would be dreaming of his death if he was here all along and God he was breathing. All of a sudden he remembered Haydyn. Where was Haydyn? He started panicking when he couldn't find her and realized that he would have to wake up Roy. He didn't want to but they had a baby. Oh god what if he was dreaming? He'd have to wake up right and then he would be fine. Roy would still be with him and then he'd get Haydyn. Suddenly he spotted her between them and wondered how he could not spot her right away. She was his daughter and he became good at it over the months. He happily snuggled into bed then savoring the memory of his lover and their daughter._

Ed was up with a blink.

Looking over he saw Haydyn sucking her thumb in her sleep. She had often did that, although it was nights when she didn't lay on her side with her mouth opened. He sighed. The girl was going to be the death of him yet and she was only eight months old. Remembering the dream suddenly, he turned expecting to see Roy only to be disappointed. It really was just a dream. Roy isn't here and he won't ever be again. He raked a hand through Haydyn's baby raven hair and laid back with a sigh. Often these days he found himself waking up and hoping beyond all doubt that whatever he dreamt would be real. His need to see the man again often set himself to disappointment after disappointment. Roy wasn't coming back. He died eight months ago in order to save the girl in front of him now. It was getting to where Ed would often try to wake the man up and his dream would end. It was always the same result in the end though; an empty side that Roy no longer inhabited.

"I miss you Roy. Why are you doing this to me?" He pulled the ring free from his night shirt and held onto the ring tightly, holding it close to his chest. "I used to believe that I didn't need you but now I couldn't imagine the thought of ever living without you."

He frowned knowing that Roy had made that choice in the beginning and he couldn't blame him for it. He didn't want to die. But Ed knew he would have willingly given up his life for the child if he had to and it came down to abortion or possible death. His choice was still stinging Ed. I don't care what decision he made he should have told me, Ed thought to himself.

He looked over again and saw Haydyn's dark midnight eyes blinking up to him. He smiled softly and let the chain slip back inside his shirt. She smiled that cute small smile when she wasn't getting into mischief and Ed placed a palm on top of her head.

"Goo goo."

Ed nodded.

Whatever that meant, it had to be something informative. He glanced at the clock and noticed that it was just about five a.m. about now. He groaned really wanting to get to sleep now but just the idea of what Hawkeye would do if he walked in late was not worth the few hours of extra sleep in the end. Sighing, he pulled the blankets off of him and Haydyn tried to follow.

"Come on, let's get you something to eat and then get you dressed."

Haydyn nodded.

"Gaga."

He nodded again.

"Say papa."

She just looked at him and he sighed. No matter what, he was going to get her to say that name first. She had to. Then man sacrificed enough for her to live and he deserved it. But she wasn't anywhere close to saying anything yet. She had some time at least and Ed was willing to spend that much time trying to get her to learn it. She would get to know the man that gave his life for her, he told himself.

After they were fed and dressed, he picked her up and headed out the door. He noticed that it was sprinkling and grabbed an umbrella. Haydyn leant forward and put her little arms around his neck . Ed smiled and continued to trek through the rain while they were safe under his umbrella. It was just six thirty and he had another fifteen before he had to be at headquarters. He slowed down, musing about how everything seemed dull and grey. It didn't have to be dreary and raining for that to happen however.

Oh Roy, this place lost all color when they took you from me, he thought depressingly. And to think he would've continued to believe it was a hoax until the funeral. Since that day, he tried his best to forget. It only caused more pain for him whenever he woke up and remembered that Roy was gone. He hadn't cried for the man like he promised but sometimes it was getting so hard. Haydyn needed to be cared for and when Kilburn wasn't complaining about the unfairness of his own baby, there was always some other problem going on. Something that needed handling as well.

"Baba ga."

Ed nodded.

His daughter was an early riser. He thought it was because she loved spending as much time as she could with her daddy, the others believed it was so she could start her mischief making early. Ed didn't think it was fair to judge that from the bouts of mischief she had been prone to doing in the past. He honestly believed that she was afraid. She lost her papa without even knowing it and she may have only been a newborn then, Haydyn had to have picked up on everybody else's emotions. She felt it as well. Hell, the whole time in the belly she had heard his voice and it was forever absent now. Not in my dreams, Ed thought.

He knocked on Knox's door and waited before Mrs. Knox answered with a small smile. Knox was off from work so Haydyn was going to be spending quality time with her grandpa. The little girl's eyes lit up when the man came over and Ed let himself inside. Marcus scowled however and Knox just chuckled.

"Haydyn cries whenever he gets close. She'll get used to him though, that's no problem-"

"Marcus sounds somewhat like Roy. She misses him and that is probably why she cries when he comes close." Ed interrupted thoughtfully.

Knox nodded solemnly.

"Of course."

It was an understatement but Ed decided nobody was truly coping anyways. He wished that it wasn't this way. He handed over the diaper bag that he almost forgot. Knox had a car seat of his own in case he had to go anywhere and some bottles were in the fridge.

Ed waved before making his way out but just before he made it all the way down the steps, Marcus stopped him.

"Let me give you a ride. You'll get wet."

Ed stared in surprise but didn't object. It was an awkward silence for the first five minutes after starting up the car. Ed observed the young man who was only around twenty four months younger than the man he had come to love more than life. Whereas Roy had dark raven hair, Marcus's was a dark brown. It wasn't as straight either and was messy all over the place. Roy didn't even need hair gel to keep his hair flat, he only had to wet it a little in the morning although he took showers in the morning so that wasn't often necessary. Marcus had dark eyes like Knox whereas Roy must've gotten his mother's eyes.

Throughout the observation, Ed noticed that there were a lot of habits that he came to know about the man he loved. He knew that Roy hated getting wet as well as everybody else. But hardly anyone knew that Roy drooled at night. They didn't know that Roy often lay on his side and held onto anyone he could for warmth. Often Ed ended up trapped in his embrace for the better part of the night even more so after he got pregnant with Haydyn. He hated that but seeing as how he could never feel the man's warmth ever again, he missed it. He missed it badly now that he didn't have the man's warmth.

Feeling the tears at the corner of his eyes, he quickly wiped them away. He couldn't cry damn it! How often did he want to break down and just scream. He wanted to physically punch something. He didn't want to feel the need to do these things, he just wanted the man to come back. He noticed Marcus raising an eyebrow and quickly erased his previous thoughts, pretending that nothing was out of the ordinary.

"You miss him." It wasn't a question.

Ed sighed.

"Of course I do. I loved that man and I don't think I even know how to stop. He's been gone for eight months already and it seems like forever that I last saw him."

"Doesn't help that Mr. Kilburn won't keep his mouth shut huh?"

Ed could only shake his head and turn to stare out of the window. Kilburn was annoying and a pest but he didn't think that was the main issue. He could ignore him on the good days but he couldn't ignore some of what he said. He did miss Roy he really did but the man stated that he hadn't missed him. Said that he hadn't even gone to his grave which was true but not for the reasons he had stated.

"He just needs to learn to keep his fat mouth shut. Just because his child died and Haydyn lived doesn't mean he suffered more."

"I know that. I didn't even get the chance to know my brother and yet I feel I know him a lot better whenever you talk about him. It makes me proud to know that my brother was depended on so much."

Ed raised an eyebrow. He knew that the man never got to see his brother, never actually met him face to face but from what he was seeing, it seemed that the man looked up to the man even then. It made Ed feel terrible. He should have gotten to know his brother. Ed had in a way taken the chance from him. Although Roy did choose to save his baby over his own life, Ed was the one who wanted a kid in the beginning making truth to the saying, 'be careful what you wish for.'

He was about to reply to that but noticed that the car had stopped. He turned his curious eyes to Marcus who just smiled and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"Don't be too sad. Haydyn isn't coming out any worse for wear. You're doing the best you could and I know it, my dad knows it, hell even my mom notices and it takes a lot for her. We all love Haydyn and forgive dad for his past relationship. Let's face it, you're going to be prying that girl from mom in the future because she already loves her so much."

Ed smiled albeit a sad one.

"But she will never know the love her papa had for her."

It was a statement but not any less true.

* * *

><p>"Havoc, knock it off."<p>

Havoc glared at the woman but sighed letting her take the lead. They were glad that at least Fuery was back at the office come Elric went in at the usual time. He also knew this scene was not a place for the both of them which made it perfect. Blood splattered the ground although it seemed to have been slowly washing away. He favored his unlit cigarette in his mouth before making his way closer just short of the actual body. It was a tremendous attack and one that Havoc knew would cause discontent along the military. Armstrong was quite a ways back and didn't come closer for the time being but he couldn't blame the man. Anyone that would harshly do this to a child deserved the worse possible death.

"What do we have so far?"

Johnson May was a new MP and even though his work lacked tact, at least he got to the bottom of things. The others took one look at the scene and their faces transformed into disgust slowly moving away from the scene to vomit. Looks like the MPs had new bodies on them, Havoc mused. It was very much a bad thing that they had to come out today and observe this.

The baby looked as though it was beaten to death. Only there were slashes to the torso as though the child were a dummy. The baby had light brown hair and from what he could tell brown eyes. Toe nails were violently removed and there were bruises from head to toe. He hoped that Ed didn't walk onto this scene. This was something he couldn't see especially with the little eight month old of his always being left with either Knox or Madame. They didn't want him to worry more than necessary but they couldn't tell who would do this. They didn't have any identification and it looked like Knox would have to come down to do an autopsy.

"What happened? What do we have so far?"

Havoc favored him with a schooled expression before Hawkeye spoke up. She was recently promoted to Captain and even if she hadn't been, she was still the most senior in the office after Ed when Mustang died. It affected them all in different ways though. Fuery lost the man he looked up to, Breda lost a person that knew how to play chess, Falman lost a comrade, Havoc lost the one that he would follow into death and Hawkeye obviously lost someone she cared about a lot. He shook his head. Out of all of them Ed was still suffering the worse because he never let himself cry. He didn't even see his grave. He turned over and observed the scene again as Hawkeye began talking.

"Lieutenant, we got word that last night there was a desperate cry from Ms. Sullivan that her daughter wasn't in her bed. The child would often sneak out and try to go to the pool but she couldn't find a trace of her in the backyard. Then this morning we got a call. Apparently someone had come into the alley since it was a short cut to her house and screamed when she came upon this body."

"Captain was it the missing child that the MPs were looking for?"

"It was not Lieutenant." At his shocked look, Hawkeye sighed. "There's another seen fifteen minutes from here. I have Officers Falman and Breda over there as we speak. The child that went missing last night was found in a trash can in the back of the housing area. They concealed the body in a plastic bag after wrapping it in a blanket. It's hard to tell though when the duct tape was applied to the mouth. The mother is still beside herself with worry but we wanted to wait to give her the news that her daughter was found dead."

Johnson turned with a scared expression on his face. It looked as though someone was kidnapping these kids and beating them before disposing of their bodies. So far there were two small female children and no leads as to who were doing these awful things. They didn't have all the information down since the first reported incident was last night and it was only now that they realized it was a serial case.

"How old was the child?" He gulped thinking about what this would mean.

"She was four going to turn five in two days."

Havoc interrupted the chat after getting off the phone with Fuery. He got word that Fullmetal walked into the office and had no idea what was going on. They hadn't told him anything as of yet but it was only a matter of time before he found out. In the meantime, he made some more calls and learned that there was a child missing right next door from Gracia's house.

"We'll have to look into the other missing child report that just happened forty minutes ago."

Johnson swore and it was all Hawkeye could do to not curse herself. This was getting bad and the weather was getting worse. Johnson turned towards them and whilst moving out the way to let the investigations get their pictures he continued his thought.

"Anyone we know in the last month or so that had a grudge on children? Female children should I say?"

"Not that I know of," Hawkeye answered although her eyes never left the small body. It was horribly wrong to see such a youngster die in a horrible way. Havoc seemed to agree.

"It's not only females though. The report forty minutes ago was a woman's two month old son."

Johnson gasped before cursing the 'sick mother fucker that would do something like that' and then he turned away from the scene. Havoc couldn't very much blame him though and continued to wonder when things went so much out of control. Armstrong caught up with them when the body had been removed and placed into the vehicle to transport it to the morgue.

"We need to call Knox. He may not be the only one that could perform autopsies but he is the only one that wouldn't vomit at the first look."

"I don't know about that last one." Havoc chewed on the end of cigarette thinking this was all ironic. "He is spending time with his eight month old granddaughter. I think in the past he wouldn't have felt so nauseated but looking at those kids makes you think about what would happen if it were Haydyn, don't you?"

Armstrong let out a sound between a moan and a cry before quickly nodding.

Was it only eight months since their commander died? They wondered how he would have handled this if he were still here? He definitely would be the one taking charge and telling everybody to get a grip. He knew he would and that was what he liked so much about the chief. He even got the junior enlisted to bend to his will without so much as a look. He wasn't here anymore. Havoc had to get used to that because he couldn't count on the dead man to bail him out of situations anymore. He had to get over himself and take charge like the man had taught them after all these years of working under him.

"Hey Mathews, get information on who saw these kids, who babysat them, who reported them, and when exactly they likely went missing. Sumners, go down and get a list of any and all people that have had a record against children or were put in jail within the last twelve months for child abuse. Rogers, put up a list of the children and compare their cases. What is the same and what is different. We need to alert everyone who has children a.s.a.p. as well."

He waited while they just stared back awkwardly. Things weren't going well and nobody had been able to take charge since they arrived here at 0625. It was horrible that somebody would want to kill children, and Havoc knew that but they had to get their asses in gear before the person struck again.

"Do as the lieutenant says!" Hawkeye ordered and then they went to get about doing their tasks.

It was amazing what one person being in charge could do. People lost all aspects of control whenever tragedy happened that Hawkeye had been grossly surprised when Havoc had taken charge. That's what they needed. When they lost all thought and organization they needed someone to take charge and order them just to have distraction. It was the best idea that Havoc had had all morning but at the same time she realized there were things that would forever be missing as well.

"We need to tell Edward that means and to alert Gracia. A two month old going missing is just odd. Who would snatch a two month old and how did they do it when their parents had been in the house. I could see a two year old because they sleep in different rooms half the time but a two month old cries at night Havoc. Remember Haydyn? When she was two months nobody in the building got sleep."

Havoc grinned wryly.

"Of course but it was only because he had an apartment at the time and the walls were paper thin. Haydyn also sleeps in his bed. There's got to be something similar about each child and we'll find out don't you worry."

Hawkeye couldn't help but think that maybe Havoc was right. Of course he was, what was she thinking. The only thing that left Hawkeye wondering about this in the end was the fact that Havoc stated that they would find the person who did it with a multitude of confidence in his voice.

I only wish I could believe you Havoc, she thought grimly. Half of us lost faith though and even eight months later, we don't know what we're gonna do.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal alchemist.

Warning: Past MPREG. Violence, crimes are being done to children.

* * *

><p>TWO<p>

Ed spent the day grueling over paperwork and imagining what his daughter was doing. He tried to ignore the strange looks that Fuery sent his way, especially when he picked up the telephone. He knew something was going on because the others were always here and especially before noon. Sighing, he waited for him to look at him again before giving a warning glare which only succeeded in bringing out a long eep in the young man before returning back to his own business.

When they weren't there after lunch, Ed turned to Fuery. He didn't leave headquarters almost all day and that was because he couldn't get behind in paperwork. Damn it he wasn't made to be a paper pusher but then again, it was the only way to make sure they kept him from going on missions.

"Where's the rest of them huh Fuery and don't tell me you don't know. I saw you giving me looks all day."

Fuery gulped and seemingly tried to ignore him but it wasn't easy. Ed just stared him time while tapping his foot with his arms crossed. Fuery couldn't stand pressure and it was obvious he would crack if this kept up. Smiling, he waited with bated breath hoping the man would fold.

He didn't have to wait long for Fuery to screw up however. Finally the poor man couldn't take it anymore.

"They're at the crime scene!"

Ed frowned not expecting that.

"What crime scene? I haven't heard of any murders."

Fuery gulped again.

"They told me not to tell you, that's why. But they were going to tell you anyways because the murders have been on children. First one was a two year old found in an alley. Then there was the four year old found in a trash can behind housing. They were vicious with her. More than the slashes they put in the two year old. The autopsy revealed that the four year old had been suffocated with tape thrown over her mouth and that her nose must have been covered too at some point. Then she was thrown in a plastic bag and placed in the can. The two month old was found alive though and was crying when we found him. He recently was taking to the hospital and it was determined that somebody poisoned the child. He isn't expected to make it."

Ed nodded and while trying to take this in, wondered where Haydyn was now. He suddenly realize what that meant and wasted in no time to collect his things. Fuery looked worried and didn't really seem to know what to do about the situation at hand but Ed wasn't worried about Fuery at the moment. He was going to make sure his daughter wasn't suffering and she was okay. He wasn't going to let her be killed too because she was way too precious. An idea came to mind and he turned back to the startled man.

"So there's only been two deaths and an eventual one thanks to poison?"

Fuery nodded not being able to speak.

"I wish you'd tell me earlier. I'm gonna get Haydyn and make sure that she's-"

"Dada!"

He paused and saw the child. He was happy to see her but frowned realizing that she had said her first word. It wasn't papa but she finally said something that he could understand. He picked her up and allowed her to put her arm around his neck and kiss him. Haydyn loved burrowing close to it when she slept. He would have to guess that she loved the warmth and wanted to be close when she was most vulnerable.

"Knox you here too?"

"Do you honestly think they wouldn't call me when it came to this?" he asked and Ed decided not to ask anything further. Knox seemed pissed. "Mrs. Hughes is staying with a friend so that they could better keep watch on their children. You may know Mika the little girl that Elysia is often going on about?"

Ed nodded hesitantly.

Mika was the one to demonstrate how much of a good story teller she was. This was the girl that Roy brought up once saying that geniuses were becoming more common because of that. But it was also known that she lived with her adopted mom and dad. Mr. and Mrs. Sullivan he realized. They were good people although they could never have children. They were looking for a baby when they found her and decided that they wanted Mika even though she was three years old. That had been two years ago.

"She was the one found in the trash can. It was horrible. Not only did she have twenty five welts on her body alone but she had her toe and finger nails taken off. She had bleeding in her abdominal cavity and I could hazard a guess that there had been sexual abuse as well. Her pelvic wall was torn. The thing that killed her was the duct tape over her face though. Truly tremendous but not only that they had to seal her body in a plastic bag with her little blanket. Her mom said she didn't go anywhere without it. Damn culprit better hope they're never found. It's vile to kill an innocent child!"

Ed nodded numbly in agreement. He didn't know what he would do if anything happened to his daughter and this murder was truly gruesome. He had met Mika once now that he thought about it. The Sullivan's had held some type of outing and invited anyone they could think of. The little girl was sugar high by the end of the day that they had trouble getting her to bed. But before all that, she told him that she was sorry that god took the one he loved. She said he became a pretty star and that he was looking out for the one he loved and that they will be together again someday. It almost made Ed cry but he held back.

"The two year old really did have slashes on her body?" He was almost afraid to find out what happened to this poor child but he worked in the military and he wanted to get rid of the culprit just as much as Knox did.

"She had forty slashes to her torso. The culprit showed no remorse in cutting the baby up. Then tore off her toe nails. She had torn and bloody ears making us believe that there are baby earrings missing. Her lip was torn and again there was a tear to the pelvic wall. Her death was due to blunt force trauma to the abdomen. She was kicked so hard that it killed her."

Ed was shocked to say the least but Knox wasn't smiling and it seemed that nobody would be safe until this killer was found.

"Of course the two month old recently died. They found large quantities of arsenic in the system. Could be a message that not even babies are safe. Anyone else and this would be a sensation for those that still hate the military to be talking about how we are failing to keep their kids safe."

"What if the target is the military?" Fuery asked. "Then when we're in the limelight, they sweep in and supposedly save the day to make us look bad."

Ed was thinking about it. It seemed really farfetched since the military had been better these days. General Hakuro was even retiring and they were putting a female, whoever it was to be the new leader. Ed closed his eyes trying to tie this all together. Haydyn was issuing loud snores from her position on him. It was all he could do not to hold her and never let her go. Some people were just sick.

"I don't think so boss. The children come from different parts of the city. They don't have the same babysitter either and the only link we found between the two girls and the one baby is the man that used to watch them. He died though and they have valuable witnesses stating that the girls were in their beds."

Ed turned and surveyed Havoc looking beat and plain tired but for the most part was doing okay. Ed nodded hoping that they had a better lead than that. Anyone that would willingly do all that to a child was sick. He would never do any of this to Haydyn. He shook his head letting all of this fit in. Al was in a seminar at the moment and Winry was in Rizenbul visiting Granny. Alex was fine and Winry was doing well as well. Al was a huge surprise though since he waited a whole two months after the funeral to announce his wish to become a doctor.

"I love alchemy brother and I always will but seeing my brother in law suffer so much made me do some thinking. If preemies had a better chance of living, he wouldn't have hesitated to get the C-section as recommended. He would have survived as well as the baby. I'm going into medicine and make sure to make a difference." He had told him this and he went through with it as well.

Al did make a good doctor but seeing as how two little girls were slashed mercilessly down and an infant was poisoned, Al would only crumble at the news. But Alex was three years old and was in the age limit of children getting killed.

"I don't want to worry Al but is it only in Central that this is happening or-"

" There's been another murder!" Falman and Breda ran in as quickly as they could while panting from exertion. Breda looked pounds lighter since this thing began in the wee hours of the morning. He could very well lose weight by the time they solved this case.

"Who has it been?" Knox asked with a frown.

Ed could tell that he wanted nothing more than to stop this as well. Knox had two sons and his only granddaughter. There was no way the man would stand for child abuse nor would he like the murderer that killed them. He blinked realizing the man wasn't going to keep his control for much longer.

"It was a three year old in Rush Valley. Supposedly the boy was missing for about an hour before the mother noticed and sent a cry of help. They haven't found him yet but they say that he's usually off running around and disobeying his mother's command to stay with her at all times. "

"That's not a murder, it's a missing children-"

"That's where the murder comes in. A young girl about almost two was found in a ravine south from there. MP officials have said that she was beaten so bad that she vomited and the cause of death was a deadly punch to the head. She must've seized as well."

"Oh god, when is this nightmare going to end?" Ed whined holding tightly onto Haydyn. Haydyn seeing this held onto her daddy tighter. She whined and his only response was to sit back down keeping his daughter with him. The girl pushed herself flush against him and began to fall asleep again. Havoc chuckled watching the child before becoming serious again.

"We need to get involved with these officials and ask everything that they found out so we can solve this. This isn't serial killings, this is capital murders that if it goes to the president, we'll be torn apart by-"

"Glad to know somebody told me about what happened!" By the sound of sarcasm every head turned.

There in all her glory stood the new President Olivier Armstrong and she didn't seem happy at all to just find out that there were murders happening all over the better part of the country. Before Ed could explain what was going on, Havoc interrupted, replacing the deteriorating cigarette with a new fresh one although he didn't light this one as well. It was becoming a habit just to have it hanging out of his mouth.

"We meant to tell ya honestly President but we have been at the crime scenes all day kicking up dirt. There is no way that so many children with so many differences could be murdered by the same person and yet they're happening."

She gave him a cool expression before sighing.

"Update me as soon as you find something. I will not stand for a killer coming into this country or being in this country and killing off the ones that don't know right from wrong yet. These kids are still innocent." She paused gazing at the baby in the room. "You do know that having a kid here could get you in trouble but seeing the circumstances, next time bring a note."

Before they could counter what she said, she had already left

* * *

><p>"Bring a note she says. Oh it could get you in trouble bringing a kid here."<p>

Al just sighed.

Ed was being dramatic again. He should have faced this problem ages ago. If Ed didn't like someone he was going to mock them. The horrible thing was, he fell for the one he mocked the most and now that person was gone. He couldn't believe it though. He hated the fact that the murderer was killing children. He had a child under the age of five and even then killing six year olds and seven year olds even wasn't great either.

"Ed if you don't like the new President then don't. Nobody is making you like her, all you have to do is make sure that you respect her."

"I don't respect her either. She's rude, cruel, and only cares about one thing; herself. She doesn't care that there's children dying by the maniac and that we are trying to limit the amount because children don't deserve to die."

"Funny you once said Roy was the same way and look what happened." Al wish he hadn't said that because as soon as he did, Ed's eyes darkened before he nodded.

"I thought I didn't need him Al and he was only getting in the way when we were trying to find the stone. It changed since the day he said he loved me. Wasn't very cocky then though. He said it three times. Once when he was drunk, the second time when he was sober and convinced me of a thing known as true love, and the last time was when he died. Makes you realize just how strong the power of love exists. I exist for you and only you. I will only tell you I love you as long as my heart allows it. I will tell you I love you and only two times will it count. Once when I tell you how I feel and with my last breath so you will know that I can never hate you even after death."

Al was close to tearing up after hearing those. His brother was never one for love but hearing that, he realized that he hated Roy all over again. Love him my ass. Roy why did you have to go and leave the one that loves you all alone. You can't protect Haydyn if your buried six feet under. He was brought out of his thoughts by seeing the famous pyrotex gloves that the late flame alchemist owned. He didn't know Ed had had them and wondered why he kept them all this time.

"I've been saving this for when Haydyn's older. She'll possibly want to learn alchemy plus I could find out how to use this to protect her. I know my alchemy has saved me for a lot of things…"

"What is it brother?"

Al didn't know what got his brother so down but he wanted him to know that he was here for him when he needed it. He was making giant leaps and bounds with what he was doing and hopefully he was doing something great. But he hadn't felt like it he had yet so he was still working. He found he loved being a doctor and that he was helping even if he hadn't discovered a way to help premature infants as of yet.

"Alchemy is supposed to be so great and yet it can't help the dying. It can't keep you from dying either. Makes you think about why science is so great if you still can't save the one you love."

Al frowned.

"I know you can't stand this Ed. But brother there can't be any common factor that you think of for those kids. I mean let's not talk about them, it makes me want to cry just thinking of it. If Haydyn had been any more premature I'm sure you wouldn't be talking to me about this-"

"Can you repeat that Al?"

Al looked up in shock.

"I don't know what-"

"Exactly though. Those kids. Has anyone looked to see what hospital they were born in. Or possibly that they were preemies as well. Maybe the person had a grudge against a particular hospital or their baby was a preemie and ended up dying. You're great Al and I love you!"

"No you don't, you just love the idea." He smiled though to show he was only joking and Ed rolled his eyes.

"Being a doctor has made you more cynical."

Al nodded.

He knew his brother would solve this and in the meantime he promised to help by watching Haydyn. The little girl was passed out on the couch and it had been such a long while since he had seen the girl. She was cooing in her sleep which was really cute but the best part was getting the picture in the mail. Even though he knew Ed must have been crazy at the time. Who gave their four month old at the time a lollipop. Even if the four month old liked it as well. He was setting that girl up to be a menace and Al hoped that he learned that he shouldn't give the girl everything that she had wanted.

"Be safe."

He hoped his brother would always be. Until then they had to make sure the future generation was safe first. He frowned, just thinking about it.

"It could be worse. Ed could be in a jungle with a mad killer on the loose or he could have a cold. He has neither so my brother would be fine."

* * *

><p>Ed sneezed a couple of times and Havoc offered him a hankie with a laugh.<p>

"Is someone talking about you boss. I swear you hardly ever get sick." Ed just glared before snatching the hankie and using it before attempting to return it.

By rank he was the highest next to the dead brigadier general which put him in charge by default. He suddenly realized though why the man hated his paperwork and he did it while watching the others to make sure they didn't slack off as well. Them slacking off meant that they stayed an hour or two late each day and he wouldn't have that. He still hadn't gone into the man's office since the day he died and he was sure the rest hadn't either. They couldn't stand the overwhelming memories just thinking about where the man was now.

"This is the sewer sector. You may remember since your little date with scar that time back-"

"DAMN YOU HAVOC IT WAS NOT A DATE! THAT MAN ALMOST KILLED ME YOU ASS!"

He paused seeing the look that Havoc passed onto Hawkeye. It had only been a second but it was enough that had Ed convinced that he wasn't just seeing things. He smirked and then made a cup with his hands and mumbled only loud enough for Havoc to hear.

"Forbidden love I see? If you told Hawkeye how you feel I doubt she would kill you so much. That or get her jealous but once she found out, she'd probably try to kill you so-"

"I don't pretend boss. She is seeing someone anyways. A man named Phillip Andrews. I know that he is okay but in my mind I sometimes wish he was the killer so that she would break it off with him. I just end up feeling guilty though. I told her how I felt you know?"

Ed hadn't. He felt bad for Havoc. He had some feeling for her however slight and since the woman was dating, she turned him down. It was not exactly fair but at least she was still alive and Havoc didn't only see her in his dreams. That was the one thing Ed hated most about himself. He kept dreaming about the man and believed the nightmares were the ones that had him dead. He thought often that if he woke up, he would be able to see him and tell all about the horrible dream he had. Roy was never there when he awoke though.

"I'm sorry she has a boyfriend."

"I am too. She started to date him shortly after I told her how I felt. Turns out, I think she is afraid to be in love after what happened between you and the chief. It was hurtful and still is though."

"It won't be the same because she isn't a guy-"

"And that means what Ed? Women die in childbirth every day. Roy wasn't the only one lost to the horrors of childbirth and he won't be the only one. Difference is he is a man and the only thing you could think about is how he left you. I have news for you though, I'm not trying to be mean but you have to concentrate on the fact that he's dead so that you could move on and be there for Haydyn. It's selfish that you keep thinking about only yourself when there's her. The little girl that won't ever see him and grow to think that she killed her own papa because her daddy can't be happy with the fact that he still has a part of him that's alive."

Ed froze hearing all this. A part of him believed Havoc was right but his mind couldn't help it. He missed Roy terribly and wouldn't ever forget what it was like that day in the hospital when he woke up and came to know that Roy was gone. He didn't want to believe, couldn't help but think it was a nightmare and that both were okay. But he wasn't okay because he was dead and he kept trying to forget that. He tried to become a good parent for Haydyn too but it was hard. Being a single parent was hard work and not just because he was alone but because he had wanted to raise her with Roy.

"I'm sorry boss, I went too far-"

"No, you were just telling me stuff I have had trouble seeing myself. Thank you Havoc." He mumbled.

Havoc just sighed before changing the subject.

"Well remember what you said about the preemie theory. Well out of the five children only one of them wasn't a preemie and it was the one that was poisoned. We still haven't found the missing toddler from Rush Valley but we know the child found in the ravine was eighteen months and had a severe disability from being four months premature. Mika was born at thirty gestation and had problems learning. The two year old was miraculously not disabled but was born at thirty one and seven gestation. So in short all the other four kids were born early."

Ed nodded.

He hadn't wanted to be right because now it looked like the man just wanted a little bit of mercy killing. Or maybe a woman he thought inwardly. It could be either but he wanted to know who it was so he could kick the person's ass. How dare somebody put tape over a small child's mouth and suffocate them before dumping them like trash? It was ridiculous.

Havoc put an arm out and stopped Ed pointing to the tricky landscape where the factory was. Ed didn't know why they were on the outskirts looking this way but he suddenly saw it. He heard it too and he knew Havoc was not one to pass up investigating the reason.

"I got a call that some kids were throwing stones and had to check it out boss." Havoc's explanation was a relief to Ed since he didn't think he could see a child's mangled body.

Going forward, he expected to see the troublesome kids running but he didn't. What caught his eye was a bush to the side and the dripping of its soft tipped ends with liquid from an unknown source. He was horrified in thinking what it could be. He didn't want to get closer but Havoc had other ideas because he leant forward in curiosity.

"Funny I told those damn miscreants that items not bottled weren't allowed here." It was only after picking up the object did he see the human skull.

He dropped it and it rolled for some time before landing in front of Ed. It was small so it had to have been a small child maybe between the ages of one to one in a half. Hell it could have been six and further if he known any better. The skull was battered frayed and Havoc looking though the bushes brought up decomposed clothes and a back pack with all the kids handy works. Ed wasn't thinking properly, he knew it. All they found was the skull and not the rest didn't even faze him so much as seeing the skull in front of him had. He did the only thing there was to do.

He screamed and did so loudly.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal alchemist.

* * *

><p>THREE<p>

The skull ended up being a fake but even then there hadn't been any more murders since then. It was surprisingly quiet since then without any strange disappearances as well. Ed knew it was only a matter of time and that it was just the calm before the storm. Anyone that killed children was really sick and didn't just stop like that. No, they needed somebody to come along to stop them. He remembered Barry the Chopper and knew that it took intervention to stop his senseless murders of woman as well.

Since then Haydyn had turned a year old and was babbling more. She was walking and attempting to make words that he could understand. He didn't get her often though. Most thirteen month olds weren't as smart as her and they didn't imagine things. Or so Ed seemed to think. When she played, she liked to do so alone and Ed was worried that her being with only parent was making her turn out weird. He even shared that to Knox as he was always there to listen to his ramblings no matter how stupid they seemed to other people and sometimes, even to himself.

"Ed, it looks too early for her to have an imaginary friend but from the way you explained it, that is what she seems to have. It's eerie and I think you should watch her for now."

Ed just nodded.

"Imaginary friend huh? That could explain why her vocabulary has been oddly good for a thirteen month old as well."

Dr. Knox just looked at him.

"How so? Whenever she's here she hardly talks and doesn't show off any abnormality you have seen but you know her best." He knew it was true even though Ed may disagree. He was the girl's daddy. He had to know her more than anybody else.

"Like I said it doesn't happen all the time but the other day she was in the backyard and I was watching her. She was digging in the dirt so I just assumed she was playing as usual but I didn't notice that she was creating a complicated transmutation circle with the stick in her hand and if that was bad enough, she tips her head to the left and goes, 'yah papa.' That just creeps me out!"

Knox stayed silent for a moment. It was weird that something like that would happen but didn't the other children that ended up murdered have parents that had died as well? Hell he didn't know about the others but Mika had claimed that her parents would talk to her. It couldn't be that bad but she needed to be watched more closely. Pausing, he gave Ed a look before he decided to ask the question that was on his mind no matter how fearful it may be.

"What was the circle? What was it?"

Ed sighed.

"It was the same exact duplicate as the one on Roy's gloves. Can't you see why I'm worried? She's talking to invisible people, which makes me more convinced that it's something to worry about AND she is drawing her papa's circle."

All Knox could do was stare. It scared him to think that Haydyn was doing any of those things but he decided that it wouldn't be a problem at the moment. Yes, they should definitely watch her but she was not heading in a wrong direction. She could however could have made an imaginary friend in order to cope with whatever it was she was going through. Little kids did the weirdest things but not like this.

Whatever it was, he only hoped that she grew out of it and fast.

* * *

><p>It appeared to only worsen as she got older and once she didn't even want to go to her grandpa's house yelling, "Papa say no go." Ed was really worried and called into work to get it off claiming that he was sick just to talk to the girl.<p>

He sat her down and watched how she was now calm. Her hair was pulled to the top of her head in a ponytail tied in a green bow and she had a matching shirt with a jean skort complete with green flip flops. She was the definition of cute and only made him all the more worried that she would be a heart breaker like her papa. She was too young to think about that though and he had bigger fish to fry. Namely who she was talking to. She was twenty months old by now and was talking a lot more. Hell it scared him because she talked like a normal three year old and had a clear understanding of what he was saying on most days.

"Tell me Haydyn, who are you talking to?"

She smiled and put a finger up to her mouth.

"It a secwet," she told him with a small smile.

Like hell it was, he had wanted to say. He knew it was scaring him and she didn't seem to understand that she shouldn't be talking to invisible people. Didn't she see that? The ones that were murdered also had had one or both parents that were murdered as well. He would have to look it up but he was sure once the person was dead, they stayed dead. They didn't leave their spirit behind and talk with their child nor did they try to protect her. No he had to stop thinking it. Why would Haydyn be using the flame symbol in the back yard so much? He had to remove it several times and each time he did, Haydyn looked like she was going to pout. Of course that was before she said, "you're ruining papa's magic to keep us safe dada."

"It's not a secret Haydyn. I want to know why you are doing this. Do you want to scare your daddy? She shook her head. "Then why?"

"But daddy I not do anything. I keep us safe with papa's circle."

Ed's eyes nearly popped out. He eyed her but she refused to budge. What was it about a circle and the murders? Sighing he scooped her up and took both their coats making sure to put them on her before placing his own on himself. She looked confused, her eyes only lighting up when he grabbed her hand and took a walk down the street. Did that mean they were going to visit Uncle Alphonse? She didn't know but she didn't want to talk.

Her daddy just didn't understand why she was doing what she did. She didn't either but when she wanted to tell him more, her papa told her that daddy wouldn't understand. He didn't understand because he didn't understand the dead like she did. She wished her papa was still alive but she was happy to see him. She knew that daddy woke up wishing he were alive as well. He wouldn't tell her anything about the dead children around the country and the only thing he didn't mention was a circle to keep her and daddy safe over and over again. She was told to stay away from grandpa's house no matter what for now and that her grandpa would understand. He had lots of work to do anyways. Papa was smart and funny, she didn't know why he died on her but he was here with her now wasn't he?

They were in the apartment and Haydyn slipped in, hugging the kitten before giving her Uncle Alphonse an even bigger hug. He looked happy. She knew he was because he was making a difference by helping helpless babies like her. She tipped her head to the side and allowed a small smile to grace her lips. Papa was allowed here too. That was good. He couldn't help her in grandpa's house and she didn't understand but he said she would later. She didn't like how papa thought she was too little to know these things.

Auntie Winry came over and she hugged her with the same amount of strength as she had done with Alphonse. Alex was taking a nap so she chose not to bother him. She saw Uncle Al frown from what daddy told him but didn't pay attention to it too much. Papa said that they were worried because they didn't know. Papa told her to try to act normal but she didn't know how. All she knew was papa somehow died but he was still here talking to her. She discovered it one day when they had found the little girl Mika and found that she could suddenly stand on her own. She was having problems too. Her daddy was sure happy then.

"Hey Haydyn. Is it true that you're talking to your papa?" Aunt Winry asked.

Haydyn nodded before seeing her papa frown. Was she not supposed to let her Auntie know that? Oops.

"What does papa say?" Uncle Al prodded. She looked down a moment before shaking her head.

"I no tell."

They looked at her weirdly before Al put a smile on his face and pat her shoulder. She knew papa didn't want them to know because they couldn't understand. She couldn't say what they wanted to hear and even though he was okay with her telling daddy, he shouldn't know everything as well. She blinked in confusion.

"Why can't you say anything Haydyn? If papa told you something, we would listen. He tells you some important things right?" Aunt Winry continued.

She didn't believe in papa before he died though. She and Al didn't want papa to be with daddy until after papa died and then they saw. They saw how happy he made daddy. Daddy would never be happy without papa and they were hoping that meant he could see papa again. It couldn't happen and that's why papa wanted her to say little as possible. Because papa was only keeping them safe and then he would go back to being gone.

"Papa is gone." If anything it made daddy sad to hear her say that.

But papa was sad whenever daddy was. She remembered whenever daddy was asleep. Papa couldn't touch him like he wanted to either because he just went right through. He couldn't tell him he loved him either because daddy couldn't hear it. She wished that it was daddy who could see papa but for some reason it was only her. Why? Papa said because her soul was young and that they had no evil that they could believe. When you're older, there was less trust, less innocence, and more skepticism. That was why daddy couldn't see him.

"Papa love you dada." She watched her daddy break down without a stray thought. He was wanting to hear that right? Even though he had died, she knew he wanted to know that he didn't hate him beyond death.

"How could you see papa Haydyn. Did he tell you?" Papa disappeared though and Haydyn didn't know what to say anymore. She shook her head, her big midnight blue eyes looking wide and innocent.

She heard Winry sigh.

"Ed I think she has an imaginary friend. Don't fret. She never saw her papa because he had died when she was less than a day old. She can't say what he even looks like-"

"Papa have dark hair. Like mine. He has dark eyes. He taller than dada. My papa in the army." She knew she shouldn't have done that but underneath it all, she wanted her daddy to believe that papa really did love him. Because he cried every night wondering if he hated him for the fact that he got to live while papa died.

She didn't want daddy to think that any longer.

* * *

><p>Later, Ed left Haydyn in Al's care deciding it would be best to see Dr. Knox again. He could say that he was a little shock a little bit but only because the girl had flat out described the flame alchemist in only a way that a small girl may. She wasn't even three years old and yet she had a good vocabulary. Why would the flame alchemist appear to his daughter now of all times? He didn't understand. Why would children be killed off as well? They didn't deserve to die any more than Roy deserved to have never held his baby.<p>

What was Haydyn doing though describing him accurately? Did she see his picture? That had to be it because there was no way his daughter was actually seeing the dead alchemist. It just didn't happen. Sighing, he knocked on Knox's door, happy when he opened up. He noticed that the younger Knox wasn't there but decided not to say anything about it. She still wasn't opening up to her Uncle Marcus though and that had Ed bothered. She screamed whenever he had come close and Knox had taken to taking care of her. Him or his wife. What was Marcus's problem though? He seemed to hate that as well but he couldn't blame the girl.

"Hey."

"Haydyn described him. I don't even remember showing her his picture but she got it right. She said he had dark hair and eyes, was in the military even. She didn't know that because I tend to avoid telling her. Hell Knox what is going on-"

"I think I know what the issue is. It is a thing not well known by alchemist though. It is ancient and you probably would find it hard to believe. A child loses her mother and months later to even a year and suddenly the child can see her and even talks to her. It has been untested because only the child can see who it is. It does go away but my guess would be because of a sudden incident and alchemical energy is so big that all of a sudden they get to see their lost loved one. Maybe Haydyn can too. I know there's been a lot of recent alchemical reaction and they are based around the murders-"

"You mean an alchemist is murdering these poor small children?" Ed hated the idea that some person would be going around injuring them on purpose but knowing now that it was possible that they knew alchemy it would be a whole lot worse.

"They didn't tell you that?" Knox looked surprised. "Those cuts weren't just done with a knife. They are too straight. Knives usually leave jagged tears in the tissue but I saw neither in any case that I have been doing-"

"What about some type of protection circle? Now that I think about it, it's similar to the Flame's alchemic circle but it's also different as well. Haydyn has been real upset whenever I dig it away but whenever I come to see what she is doing, she always places another one and says that papa told her to so that we can stay safe. So is there any-"

Knox shook his head in a wry grin.

"You're asking someone who isn't an alchemist Edward. Try your brother, hell, try the girl's nana. One of them would be able to know. I have no knowledge of an-wait what does it look like again." Ed was surprised by the complete 160 in which Knox suddenly took. He took out a thick volume and leafed through the book before coming to a circle which Ed noticed greatly. His daughter had been drawing that for months.

"What is that?"

"Mustang told me about it. He was studying alchemy longer than you have and one thing he said was if all other security fails, this seal wouldn't fail. I have a hidden hunch that whoever is trying to break in has been using alchemy as well. Can you explain anything else which would be able to get children that had previously been safe in their bed? Damn either Haydyn really is smart or that damned man is trying to protect you guys even after his death." Ed found tears falling from his eyes at hearing that. He fell to his knees knowing that there wasn't a doubt the depth of love Roy would do in order to keep him safe. He had done so in the past as well.

"Why would he be here though? Why can't he just rest in peace and leave me to protect our daughter? Does he trust me at all…?"

"Ed I think what he doesn't trust is the monsters out there trying to kill her. Be reasonable. He wouldn't have given his life for your daughter if he hated you." Knox quickly reassured him.

"That's what Haydyn said," Ed realized with a start. "She said papa loves you dada. Did she know? How can she be so smart? I know that she was having problems with development before this even happened so why is she suddenly so smart? Why does it have to be her that gets to see Roy? Doesn't he realize how much I miss him? That bastard! Even dead, he can't stay in the ground. I'm sorry, I really am but I don't want him to care anymore. I want to hate him but I can't if he makes me love him so much more than I already do. What would he be succeeding in doing by creating the seals anyways?"

"It is much peskier than you may believe but children are the innocents of the world. Somebody believes that by using the blood stained by the innocence, they can create an alchemical power far evil than anything you could believe.-"

"Worse than Dante?" Ed questioned.

If this sick monster was worse than Dante, what were they using children for again? Oh yeah, because they were the innocence of the world and they needed a certain number to obtain immortality. Sounded like a stupid romance novel to him.

"Why would the seal come into play though?"

"I think you should start listening to Haydyn and let her keep the seals up. An evil being with more evil running through his veins. This person needs the blood of innocence to stay alive. I can't believe this. Ed do me a favor and keep Haydyn safe. Do me that favor okay?"

Ed nodded.

That was the only thing he could do that would not only make Knox happy but Roy wouldn't be able to rest it seemed if Haydyn was hurt. Roy couldn't be happy if his baby was being targeted. Ed managed a small smile at that. Even if he couldn't see Roy, the man was still there to keep everything from falling apart.

God he missed the man dearly. If only he were alive.

* * *

><p>AN: Please review and let me know how it is.


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